Daily Simpsons is on a temporary hiatus. In the meantime, feel free to enjoy over a year's worth of Daily Simpson's quotes in the archives. I dare you not to laugh.

Apu: "Nickel off on expired baby food."

Bart: "Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?"

Mayor Quimby: "Can't we have one meeting that doesn't end with digging up a corpse?"

Homer: "Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races."

Apu: "Silly customer, you cannot hurt a Twinkie!"